I just had to participate in this wonderful challenge, courtesy of Christine at Fruit in Season.
As easy as it is to know in my head how important it is to honor and respect Travis, it's much harder to put that knowledge into practice on a daily basis. And while I'd like to think Travis feels honored and respected most of the time, the truth is, I fall short in my efforts more often than I'd like.
What do our husbands need from us? What does honor look like? Christine gave some great answers to this question and I'll try to add a few more. The best reference I have is my own husband, so here are a few things I've learned make him feel honored and respected:
1. When I whole-heartedly support his goals for our family, specifically financially. That means, not only that I understand the value of good stewardship, but I act accordingly, staying within our budget, discussing purchases with him, telling him what I buy on a given day and entering the amount into our budget sheet right away.
2. When I talk to him without sarcasm. I mess this one up way too often! I find it so much easier to make a point using sarcasm, but it is so ugly and only creates defensiveness.
3. When I make an effort to give him down time or free time, without asking for help with the kids 24/7. Along with this, he appreciates it when I don't make him feel guilty for taking that free time.
4. When I cook a delicious meal for him, something I know he likes.
5. When I "brag" on him, both in front of him and when he's not around.
6. When I pursue quality time with him, and for him that means, doing something fun together that we both enjoy.
7. When I make the effort to have good relationships with his family, biting my tongue, thinking before I speak, and creating peace with an attitude of grace and humility.
8. When I show genuine interest in his work, hobbies, struggles, thoughts, desires, all of who he is.
I'm sure there are many more I could add to this list that are not coming to my mind at the moment, but the point is, I know what makes him feel honored and respected, now I need to go about prayerfully increasing those things in our relationship.
So, my goals for this week are:
1. Don't use sarcasm!
2. suggest a free time activity for Travis and create the opportunity for him to do it.
3. Say good things about him to others, in front of him and when he's not around.
I'll keep it at three this week for more focus. This will be great accountability when I report in next week!
9 comments:
Good goals, Sarah! I just love that we're embarking on this challenge together. We can definitely hold each other accountable. I may have to borrow some of your ideas!!
Oh, I love the idea of suggesting a free time activity and creating the opportunity for him to do it! Good thinking, wife! :)
Wow, all the things that you listed about what your husband would like from you could have come just as easily from my hubby! You've given me a lot to think about, I need to work on the sarcasm too!
Good goals!
Hi! Just visiting from the Hubby Challenge! Great blog and sweet VAN! ; )
Great goals! I hope your marriage has been blessed so far this week! Looking forward to getting your update on Monday...
Thanks for your comments on my post, Sarah. You reminded me of my ultimate time of surrender - trying to have children. I posted about my struggle with fertility with my first child. It's in my archives (February).
I struggled again with my 2nd. The dr. told me I wouldn't be able to have anymore children, but then 2 months later, I was pregnant.
I do need to post a pic of me on my blog. I'll try to get around to that.
Again, thanks for visiting! I love your blog. You're a kindred spirit! :)
I'm so happy you are joining in with this challenge. I just know God will bless our marriages by being faithful in honoring our husbands! I especially liked your goal of making free time for your husband available for him to pursue something of his interest. This is something I need to work on as well. Have a great weekend!
Those sound like excellent goals, Sarah. I'm going to borrow your ideas here at home. :)
Sarah,
I found your blog from Fruit in Season. I am new to blogging but have found many blogs that I feel God has shown me to draw some wisdom and strength from for my day. I hope to be that for others as well. I live in TX but hope to move to CO someday soon! That is my dream.
Your goals for the 30 day are great and ones we all need to aspire to.
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