One year ago today, I was beholding my firstborn son for the very first time! I remember crying tears of joy at the first sight of you, "Monkey". Sawyer Michael, what a blessing you have been to our family! You have three mommy's you know. You are loved so very much by all, that sweet smile of yours must be made of fire, because it melts the hearts of all who behold it. You are my mellow man... so far that is. Easy going, go with the flow, I often call you my happy camper. So much a year can hold, sweet son, so many firsts. I treasure each moment, locked in my memory, to hold me fast when one day I watch you graduate from high school. There will be plenty of time for letting go, for launching you into independence. But for now, precious son, keep snuggling in, putting your arms up whenever I walk by, giving that precious sigh of contentment when I oblige.Baby mine, happy first birthday!
Friday, August 21, 2009
My dearest Emma Grace. Today was a big day for you, little peanut sauce. Today I dropped you off at Kindergarten. You were so excited to get dressed this morning, in your little navy blue uniform dress and new school shoes. You were up before I had to wake you up anticipating the day ahead. You requested a bun for your hair today, but we compromised with a half bun since I like your long curls so much. Daddy and I both took you to school today while Grammy watched Chloe and Sawyer. You wanted to ride with Daddy in the Buick since that's how you'll be riding to school every day. I pulled along side you in the van and you waved at me with such excitement. I waved back with the same look of excitement while holding back the lump in my throat. "Is this really happening?" I thought to myself. When we pulled up to school, I watched daddy carry you across the street and immediately the flashbacks of him carrying you in your infant car seat across the hospital parking lot came into my mind's eye. It seems like only yesterday we were bringing you home from the hospital in your little green dress. Emma Grace, you have filled our hearts in a way that simply can't be expressed with words! You are beautiful, sweet girl, in every definition of the word, my precious firstborn. Your sense of humor, your excitement for surprises, your tender care of your sister and brother, the way you're eager to help me around the house, your sweet hugs and kisses, our priceless times before bed when I give you "tickles" on your back and we talk about everything under the sun and above it. I Cherish you so much! Today was hard for me, this little step of letting go. How can anyone love you as much as I do? Well, you know who. About a week ago, we were laying by the wading pool on our towels having a special time together and I told you that school would be starting this week and that you might miss me. I asked you if you were worried about missing me, to which you replied, "Jesus is in my heart, mommy, so if I miss you I will just pray to Him and He will help me feel better, because He is always with me." I was shocked and awed and my heart melted in a puddle right there! I said, "you're right baby, and mommy will need to do that too when I'm missing you!" But time has to move forward, and babies have to grow up and every day involves trusting God with your little heart and life, even when you're not in my care. I pray this day is special for you baby, that you have a great time with your wonderful teachers and new friends. Know that I'm always with you in my heart, I pray for you all day long and can't wait to pick you up from school! We will get through this together and no matter how many other teachers you have along the way, Daddy and I will always be your number one teachers and we are so honored and blessed to have that job!
This is the special note your teachers gave me on the way out the door with a fluffy cotton ball, a note that made me cry my eyes out all the way home!:
"Dearest Kindergarten Parents,
We just want to give you a little "gift" as you leave your little growing edge of the world with us this morning, so you will not have to go away "empty-handed".
As you hold this little cotton ball in your hand, the softness will help you to recall the gentle spirit of your child. Go home and after you have wiped your tears, make yourself a nice warm cup of tea. Put your feet up and relax. Remember, that together, we will all work along side your child, this year, to help them grown to their fullest capabilities.
Thank you for entrusting your child to us for this upcoming school year. We promise to do our very best every day to be your child's companions in learning and exploring this bright new world they have just stepped into...into the world of "I CAN!"
Tina and Heidi"
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
My sweet little Chloe Mo! How ever did you go from this...
Thursday, August 06, 2009
I'm deep in thought tonight about the direction our future, as a family, is headed. I am married to a visionary man, full of passion and excitement for the future. It's exciting to be his wife for sure, I love his passion and I too want to be courageous as we attempt to step towards God's best for our lives. But sometimes my heart gives way to fear. Fear of the unknowns, the what-ifs, sketchy finances and the like. I know that each new venture into the unknown gives us more opportunity to trust the Lord, and that is what I'm praying for tonight, that I would learn to bathe in God's promises, that I would trust God enough to trust Travis as we makes some big decisions for our future. I want to hang on tight, eyes wide open on this ride, ready to embrace what's around the next corner!