Tuesday, February 01, 2011

The Last Time

February, 2011 marks the last month I will ever be pregnant (Lord willing).  This makes me sad, but I'm also at complete peace about the size of our family and Travis's leadership to that effect.  Four children is always what we envisioned for our family and as we've prayed through the decision of family size, God has given us both the assurance that four is our number.  But there is grieving at the end of any beautiful adventure, any treasured stage, and so that's where I'm at as I look forward to the birth of this, our last, little miracle from above.  I'm so excited to meet her and yet so filled with patience at the same time.  I'm reveling in each kick and roll and contraction, the look of my pregnant form in the mirror.  Being pregnant has by far been the most joyous time in my life thus far.  My body has never felt more alive and creative and used by God and for that, I am so thankful!  Little Autumn Mae, nestled in my womb, I cherish this time with you...right where you are.  You mark the end of something so special to me and at the same time, a new beginning that I welcome with completely open arms.  There is a season, as God tells us in His Word, for every purpose under heaven, and I lay flat on my face in gratitude for the gift of getting to experience the season of childbearing.  There will undoubtedly be some tears shed, in the quiet alone of my hospital room as I fully take in the closing of this chapter, but I promise to turn those tears of sadness into tears of joy as I look forward to the next step.  And as I cherish the gift of now, I wait and love and praise the Giver of every good gift! 
p.s. I recently had some maternity pictures taken by a dear friend of mine that I can't wait to share with you.  As soon as she gets them to me, they will appear here!


Tate said...

Praise God! I'm so glad to see His work in your life and your joy in where He has you. Praying this month will be a joyous celebration for your family. Can't wait to see the pictures!


Beka said...

Thinking of you, friend, and waiting excitedly to hear the news! I will be praying for you as you wait for Little Autumn to arrive... I know it's bittersweet.
Lots of love to you.